a rough draft of what I think makes me who I am

in the chaos of living in a big city, hustling and constantly trying to catch the next bus, finding the better job, buying and selling and trying to show your amazing social life to others, I stop every now and then.

I stop and remind myself that there is me beyond all this.

the me who doesn't own any of the responsibilities that were given, perhaps by me. or the stress caused by other people's actions or opinions would not impact.

then, I ask that version of me what makes her feel alive.

here are some brief notes I have taken when I was pretending to listen to my boss in a meeting.

here are some things that I love in the outside and inside world, some things I consider to be true about me, some things I love about me and would still do and be regardless of anything

• my ability to connect and to communicate with others.

• my kindness and compassion. knowing that my actions come from a place only of good intentions.

• going to theatre, watching plays and thinking from the director's perspective

• my interest in keeping my physical and mental health in check constantly,

• playing the piano

• spending time with my cat, spending time with animals.
  

I am beyond my looks, beyond the choices made by me. I am beyond my job, possessions and simple adjectives defined by others.

there is a world inside of me that I want to explore, the depths to reach out to.